Category Archives: Blog
The Cat Thing
The rule is: if you’re trying to turn left at a four-way intersection, you have to wait for all the cars to pass. Not everyone knows this rule, apparently, because I’ve been honked at for not driving into oncoming traffic. … Continue reading
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My Absence Explained
I haven’t updated in a while because in the time that I spent working on my thesis, I unintentionally cultivated in myself the sort of habits that don’t lend themselves to writing jokes. “Have you heard this one: MacDonald’s is … Continue reading
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Glenn Beck FAQ
This piece got lost in the shuffle from the old site to the new. I wrote it a while ago with my friend Dan.
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And Now a Message from a Crazy Homeless Guy
I was reading a biography of Wittgenstein while sitting on the steps of the James Farley Post Office when a homeless man started mumbling to himself about how somebody was a, “faggot motherfucker.” He grew louder, I turned my head, … Continue reading
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No More Smiles for Candy
Taking my grandmother to the doctors’ is my Vietnam… Continue reading
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Guy Who Loves to Stab
I’m working on this one character. He’s a guy who loves to stab. I can imagine there are some people who knowingly commit crimes and enjoy doing so, but this guy just loves stabbing. He can’t get enough of it! Continue reading
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A Conversation with Noah Cicero
I first discovered Noah Cicero in June of 2007. Discovered isn’t the right word, of course, since Noah Cicero had been Noah Cicero for quite some time by that point, but, at the time, Noah was brand new to me. And while it might be the case that, since then, I’ve read every single one of his blog posts and all the books of his I could get my hands on, Noah still remains new to me every time I read something of his. Consistently, over the years, he’s continued to produce inventive and insightful content that’s kept me both a fan and an ardent promoter. Continue reading
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Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Books?!
I swung by the Rutgers Library late at night. The reading rooms were open but the books were fenced off, which means that it wasn’t a library any more. If I can’t check out books, the place is as much … Continue reading
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Worries
My mother’s worries frustrate, puzzle, and amuse me. She thinks that side effects are more likely than the medicine actually working, which means that pharmacies are stocked with diarrhea pills that might make your headache go away. Meanwhile, she puts … Continue reading
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