I’m working on this one character. He’s a guy who loves to stab. I can imagine there are some people who knowingly commit crimes and enjoy doing so, but this guy just loves stabbing. He can’t get enough of it!
“Yeah, ya, know, I just love to stab. I took a vocational test that told me I should be a butcher, but there’s not a lotta stabbing in that. I figure, crime, I can do what I love and do some good in this world. Ya know, kill some people. Mostly bad people. Well, no, I don’t know if they’re bad. Probably a lot of them were good! Doctors, plumbers, other stabbers. And it’s not always people. I’ve stabbed a lion, a real big fish, the Reel Big Fish, a painting, an issue of Rolling Stone-it’s the closest I could get to stabbing Snookie! I think Perry Farrel was on the cover.”
So, do you like to stab because it feels good or does it feel good because you like to stab?
“Hey, I’m a stabber, not a thinker!”
Answering a question is sorta like stabbing the unknown.
“See, you writer types are all the same. You think a word is like a thing. I tell you what: book about stabbing ain’t good for stabbing. Unless you sharpen it.”
He doesn’t have to be dumb! He could be really educated and love to stab. “I did my dissertation on stabbing Derrida.”
